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Writer's pictureCoach Sophia

Narcissist Hoovering: Weaving The Intricate Web

In the realm of toxic relationships, the term "narcissist" has become increasingly prevalent. It refers to individuals who exhibit a deep-seated sense of entitlement, lack empathy, and exploit others for personal gain. One tactic they often employ to maintain control over their victims is called "narcissist hoovering." This insidious behavior can be difficult to identify and escape, trapping victims in a web of manipulation and emotional turmoil. In this article, we will delve into the concept of narcissist hovering, exploring its characteristics, the psychological impact on victims, and strategies for breaking free.


Narcissist Hoovering

Unveiling the Hovering Phenomenon

Narcissist hovering is a method employed by individuals with narcissistic tendencies to maintain a hold on their victims, even after the relationship has ended. It involves a calculated and deliberate effort to reestablish contact and regain control over the victim's emotions, thoughts, and actions. Hovering can manifest in various ways, depending on the nature of the relationship and the narcissist's tactics. Common methods include:


1. Love Bombing: Narcissists may shower their victims with affection, compliments, and promises of change, attempting to rekindle the romantic or emotional connection.


2. Emotional Manipulation: Through guilt-tripping, gaslighting, and playing mind games, narcissists exploit their victims' vulnerabilities, preying on their emotions to reestablish control.

3. Hoovering: This term, often used interchangeably with narcissist hovering, is derived from the vacuum cleaner brand Hoover. It refers to the narcissist's attempts to suck their victims back into the relationship, using persuasive tactics, manipulation, and false promises.


Psychological Impact on Victims

The effects of narcissist hovering can be devastating and long-lasting for the victims involved. The constant back-and-forth between emotional highs and lows can leave victims feeling confused, anxious, and emotionally drained. Some common psychological consequences include:


1. Trauma Bonding: Victims may experience a deep attachment to their abusers, despite the toxic nature of the relationship. This bond can make it difficult to break free and create barriers to seeking help.


2. Self-Doubt and Guilt: Narcissists often project blame onto their victims, making them question their own worth and contributing to feelings of guilt and self-doubt.

3. Anxiety and Depression: The prolonged exposure to manipulation and emotional abuse can lead to the development of anxiety disorders and depression in victims.


Breaking Free: Strategies for Recovery

Escaping the clutches of a narcissist's hovering requires strength, support, and a commitment to self-care. Here are some strategies that can aid in the healing process:

1. No Contact: Severing all communication with the narcissist is crucial. Block their phone number, unfollow them on social media, and create physical and emotional distance to protect yourself.


2. Seek Professional Help: Consulting with a therapist or counselor who specializes in trauma and abusive relationships can provide invaluable support and guidance throughout the recovery journey.


3. Build a Support Network: Surround yourself with trusted friends and family who can offer emotional support, validation, and a safe space to share your experiences.


4. Focus on Self-Care: Engage in activities that promote your well-being and self-esteem. This could include exercise, practicing mindfulness, engaging in creative pursuits, or pursuing new hobbies.


Narcissist hovering is a manipulative tactic employed by individuals with narcissistic tendencies to maintain control over their victims. Understanding the characteristics of hovering and its psychological impact is crucial for breaking free from the cycle of abuse. Remember, you are not alone, and with the right support and strategies, you can reclaim your life and thrive beyond the clutches of narcissistic manipulation.

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